Tuesday, February 27, 2007

No answers to comments because...

Sorry guys, but I have no other way to inform you people about this...

I cannot post comments on my blog or any other blog on blogspot for some reason. I do recieve comments, but when I post comments the blog just goes blank and does not register it.. :(

Which is why I haven't replied to any comments on my film and on the other posts. I have replied to the comments on my film on youtube coz that was the only option I had..

please bear with my laptop (I'm convinced its my lappie's locha) coz its still learning the ways of the world!!

P.S - I haven't even commented on the blogs I regualrly do comment on. I'm sure that the people I'm talking about are getting my point. Sorry.. As an alternative you can drop me your email ID and I will reply back personally!! If you have my email id, then email me, so I can reply back there, because my gmail is not recognizing stored emaial ids too.

PLEASE dont ask me what is wrong.. I just can't seem to figure it out.. and I am ashamed about it..Maybe my laptop os sufferening form food poisoning too..

Mumbai Metblogs and me..

I lost my soul somewhere on Blogstreet..

When I began blogging for Mumbai MetBlogs, I was this enthusiastic baby. I would blog about all things which made sense, I would rejoicce when I got a comment or a feedback or a message. I would appreciate those mails that I recieved from readers. I was a happy kid.

Everytime something happened in any part of Mumbai, which i was witness too. I would nod my head emphatically and think, "I have the power of Blogging. I will post this on Metblogs." And maybe I even thought that it would make a difference in people's life..

I never wanted to be a Journalist, but I fancied myself as something akin to that. Almost there. In my admission interview at my Journalism Department, I very proudly said that I was an author at Metblogs. I was sure the people interviewing me dint know about it. So I even informed them about it!! I might not have been a regular blogger on metblogs. But I was a proud one. Then the Mumbai Blasts happened. All the bloggers on Metblogs were in full swing. Everyone churned out atleast 3 posts each. But surprisingly I dint. A fellow blogger frantically tried to contact me to find out if I was unharmed. When I wondered why such a frantic search to track me down, I was told, "you generally blog about anything as soon as it happens on Metblogs. This time you haven't so.."

Yes I hadn't. After that I posted once about the Blasts. Half-heartedly. And then my blogging there dwindled. After that, even my laptop denied me access into the site. When that was sorted out, I got a new Laptop, and now since the new lappie is in competition with the old one, it refuses me access into the site unless the old one shuts me out(I think).

But here I am, fresh after my last post on Metblogs, wondering why I dont post there so frequently anymore. Is it that I have matured, and the feedback and all dont matter to me anymore (hardly, my mind smirks) or is it because I'm having trouble all over again logging into the site from this laptop. Or is it simply because, I dont connect there anymore??

P.S Have you noticed?? A lot of my posts end in questions these days.. I wonder if its another of those things which mean that I am seriously muddled in the head right now. If the typhoon's coming, let it come I say!! ;-)

Saturday, February 24, 2007

The smaller part of why I haven't been blogging regularly

Its somehow that weird time of my life. When my insides are in some kind of a turmoil which I cant identify with.

I have nothing to say. I have nothing to feel apparently. When a major load of work passes over, I realize I have nothing to do. I can't express this to the physical people in my life, and I know the rest can do nothing about it.

There are always people who are just a phone call away, but I dont call them. The phone might travel the distance but I dont. Not anymore. I cant handle distances any longer.

Between my busy week, people came online and kept silent. I, as usual, did the same. I dint feel anything then. Suddenly the entire week's feelings are rushing into my senses now. Those people were never meant to be silent. They were supposed to always speak. Always try.

My mother says that she never lets her moods rule her life, I respond back saying that My moods always rule my life.

Then why doesn't it make me happy. It feels like everything wrong that has to happen will happen. My blog refuses me entry, my comments are not stored on my blog (which is why my replies to all the comments on my last post are not recorded) and my mind refuses to speak.


I know I need to relax. But I dunno how. I know I need to unwind. But I dunno how.

I know I'll get around to it. But I dunno HOW.

Headaches have become my constant companions. The rest of my companions all seem to be going away anyways.

I haven't been reading the blogs I regularly read up. I have nt been writing.. and I have nt been blogging. It does feel like a vital part is missing. But I still can't get around to it.

I'v been shutting out people who mean a lot, coz I feel I dont respect them anymore. But I miss there original presence in my life. That face of theirs which I respected. Why do people change so, that you stop respecting them.

Life is restrictive. It doesn't allow you the chance to go beyond its restrictions. It's true.

Saturday, February 17, 2007

Who Am I?? - My Second Film

The bigger part of why I have not posted since the last 9 odd days..

The love of my life right now, my obsession..

Something I am completely besotted with..

Somethign that makes me burst with pride and joy...

Something worth remembering for the rest of my life...

HTML link- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1EjQV_tx4XA

Again, the entire film has been done by me, directed, edited and the Voiceover too.

I know that I was besotted with the last film I made, which was also my first, but it had a lot of glaring mistakes. This film, in comparision, is definitely an improvement. Except for the shots where I'm in the frame most of the rest have been shot by me too. I'm somehow absolutely thrilled with this film, with the shots, the light, the inference, the thoughts and the music too..
I know that this can also turn out to be a similar honeymoon period where everything looks rosy and the mistakes might surface in due time.. but till then..

Thursday, February 08, 2007

Am I gonna join a Cult soon??

A wise man today told me :
"A woman is just a distortion of muscles..."

Lol.. I just cant stop laughing over this, because it is so true. It is equality at the very grass-root level and it is Discrimination at the same time too. Well actually I believe that was not the meaning of this pearl of wisdom dropped by the wise man. But somewhere this strikes true to me.

He also said :
"If you can objectify women to be equal to everything else around you, you will be free of desire and cravings. "

This wise man is someone to watch out for. I dont believe in religion and following a guru to the path of God or anything, but if such pearls of wisdom keep coming my way, I might be tempted to go to the sea bed, where the oysters creating the pearls are being manufactured.

Oh, to part with, here is another of his quotes,
"To not want anything at all is true satisfaction"

(I'm still not very convinced on this one. I want something, I get it, and thus I get satisfaction)

Tuesday, February 06, 2007

A lost chance..


Risk a turn back and see,
You've missed a sea of beauty..


Saturday, February 03, 2007

The Fried Souls of bloggers

When we entered the classroom, Melody Teacher greeted us. She then took our attendance, introduced us to all and placed us in our seats. After a while Melody Teacher thought that friends should not sit together. So she separated all 'supposed' friends and replaced the naughty ones under her nose. Melody teacher also made some girls, including me, and one boy stand outside the class for sometime. But Melody Teacher made that into an experience too, because she taught us how to stand still while moments were captured while we all naughty girls stood outside.

When it was time to leave, melody teacher bid us good-bye and also instructed the latecomers to reach on time next time like the good kids.

That's from the student. Now from the Blogger..

The blog meet happened. We (Puneet and me) entered the venue with Melody greeting us with, "Hi Bloggers??" and we left with her saying, "Let the kids go!!"

The two hosts, Sakshi and Melody introduced everyone around, pulled multiple legs, laughed and were generally great. The attendance sheet is with Melody, with all the links and the names but rattling off my top of the mind recall there was Melody, Sakshi, Vulturo, Bombay Addict, Vinu, My Pajamas, Peeyush, Amit and Shiju.
These are the bloggers. I had no conversation actually with last five.

My Pyjama had a first day blogger with him, while Shiju too had two more bloggers. Sorry dont have their names or links!! UPDATE: My Pyjama's friend and me spsoke about a common..uh.. friend.. but it is later that it dawned on me, that it was her mischief that had introduced me to the common friend.

Plizz to notice that I have not mentioned the two gems I was suppoed to look out for. One did not come as it turns out. And the other, turns up but when I was about to leave. I was pretty eager to meet IdeaSmith, so much so, that I even asked Sakshi when I sat next to her if she was IdeaSmith!! Sorry!!

IdeaSmith did come and I did meet her, but unfortunately it was just that. A brief encounter. Thankfully we did take a lot of pictures. Selma you were missed a lot!!

A lot of people asked me if I knew Selma!! And I kept wishing I did!! Personally that is. I am glad she convinced me about this meet.

This meet was not to become bosom, chuddi-buddies with each other, but more to step out of the virtual world we live in, and see each other in reality. I am really glad I met a lot of people there. I realized that there really are more people who read my blog apart from the ones who comment.
I was surprised to see Amit, the shahrukh of blogosphere as Sakshi called him, but well I did just that, see him because he seemed to be busy with the people around him.I was more surprised to see Vulturo..

I was surprised when Bombay Addict discussed a recent post of mine. He was very nice, and it was fun talking to him. Though again it was a brief talk. He gave me insightful tippanis on how very few people blog about riots and such. Surprised again!!

I was surprised when someone told me randomly... "hmm I've heard ur name somewhere" Yeah?? Wow!!

I was surprised to hear the name of a blog, Twisted Indifference. No surprised is not right, I was impressed. Somehow the name sounds..just perfect to me. Makes a lot of sense. But I dont think I told him that.

Sadly, I missed a lot of interesting people because I had to leave. And from the other posts here, here and here, it sure looks like the party had just begun when I left it...

PS. : Selma, you were right, about everything you told me to expect from the meet..the good and the bad!!
More posts here, here and here.

Thursday, February 01, 2007

Blogger's meet.. my first..

There are very few things that one can't predict. This is not to say that these predictions come true, but you now, when there is an up and coming event, incident or occasion, one can exactly predict how it will turn out. Even when you know your mom is going to scold you when you talk to her, you know what she is going to say. When you are going to meet your friends for dinner, you know how they will pull your leg, how you will have awesome amounts of fun and how you are going to have a good time after all. Even something as important as my going abroad to study can be seen pretty lucidly by me. But if there is one thing that has stumped me, its the fast-approaching Open Blogger's Meet.
Yes there is a bloggers meet coming up. And I have never attended one, but will be attending this one. In the past, due to some reason or the other, I have not attended any such meets. Those reasons also include my just not wanting to step out of chasm which identifies me by my blogs. For this meet, I was pretty much in doubt. To go or to not go. I put up a tentative thought of attending on IdeaSmith's post, which was picked up in Gauravonomics as an assumed 'attending'. IdeaSmith warmly asked me to come. But I was still deciding. A chat with Selma, finally convinced me. Orkut Zindabad!!

She had a point, I'll get to meet smoe interesting people before I leave, and she also asked me to watch out for a couple of people coz they were the gems. I already knew of one, the other I will explore. To tell the trust, I have absolutely no clue about how to take this meet. Blogging and the world of blogging or blogosphere as we call it are important enough for me to wonder and worry about this meet. I have tried initiating quite a couple of people into blogging. But I think that was more coz I wanted to share my love for blogging.

When one falls in love, they often wonder what was their existence like before they were in love. Its that way with blogging. I often wonder what my existence was like before it. Where did i write down those little things that I'd love to share. Where did my opinions go?? I hardly ever sincerely wrote a diary, coz I never needed to write down things I felt. I was happy enough having them firmly placed in my mind. But what about my opinions and those small incidents of life??
Maybe blogging happened just when I matured enough to start having opinions and intelligent thoughts. Quite possible.

Along with blogging, the bloggers have also become very important in my life. When I first started out it was in MSN Spaces. Just to write down my Shayaris. Then when I started writing down articles, it got a little personal. Reading those posts there, someone asked me to start writing for Mumbai Metblogs. I joined Metblogs, and for that I made this blog, not too personal kinds but still my personal space. On Mumbai Metblogs, I came across Selma and Sakshi Juneja, my co-authors. While I got hooked to Selma's blog, I visited Sakshi's periodically. Then I started visiting the blogs of my commentators on metblogs. The silsila started then. From one blog to another, I formed my favorites, chanced upon some USA blogs which awed me and some Indian bloggers who awed me even more.

And now this bloggers meet will bring me face-to-face with the very same bloggers. While some of my favorite bloggers wont be there (Selma, Ani), the meet still promises to have some of my favorites (IdeaSmith, Sakshi). I'm not sure about the other bloggers who are coming yet. Also another person I am pulling along with me will be an aspiring blogger, so I am glad to have that company with me.

I wish I could predict how this meet will go. Will I enjoy, dislike, unwind or be tensed in the meet. I''m sure people will tlel me now that I'm sure to enjoy, but considering the fact that I am not the partying kinds of people... Also I'll have to leave pretty early, 9 or so.. maybe I wont get to meet them properly at all, or worst maybe I wont meet them at all coz people might arrive after the decided time.

I will be taking pictures (If everyone doesn't mind that is) and I will surely post about the meet. But I can't even predict that... I sound idiotic don't I??


On another note, my professor called today to tell me that thebig.tv, a video site, has featured my first film, Mumbai-Fire and Blood on it's site. The site requires a password to get in, so I cant see it :( but I sure am thrilled. Although I grew to dislike that film because of its glitches, I was pleasantly surprised to know that someone thought it good enough to feature on the site, a more happier thing was that my Professor appreciated the film and left back a comment too!! Maybe my application will be more powerful with that film on it..