Saturday, October 11, 2008

Those three essential things for any kind of feelings..

"I can fall in love with someone because of their intelligence, its one of the three things that can get to me.."
"What are the other three things?"
Pause
I knew there were three things.. I just hadn't really put my mind to it to think what those three things were, you know? And this was not a person who would let me change the topic at this point.
"aah.. this might sound shallow but pampering maybe? I guess if someone pampers me a lot, I could fall in love with them." I have had cousins who have pampered me crazy, and I have adored them. So I guess, it could work...
"And the way a person treats other people around him. The respect you give other people, the distance you maintain, the way you talk to them." Now that was the correct one of the two. I was sure.


But pampering? I thought about it all night. Can I really fall for someone because they'd pamper me crazy? And then some instances came to my mind. Pilot insisted on me taking the diamond ring he got me. I refused, he actually went up to the sea to throw it. I took it. I love the ring, I had designed it. But I din't fall in love with him.

Pilot always always pampered me. If I saw a toy I liked, it would be sent to my place in a few days, twice in a week, fresh flowers would be delivered to my place, fancy dinners, and coffee every other night. I did not fall in love with him. And then he started hanging out with my parents. He respected them, took advice from them, revered them. That's when I even started thinking of him as someone who I might be able to be with. He wanted to them help out with the summercamp kids. He was beautiful with them, strict, scary but lovable. That's when I realized that he is worth a lot more. If things would have continued a bit, who knows I might have been in love with him (if love is possible). But end of story, I did not fall in love with him. Inspite of all the pampering, and inspite of all the respect I saw him give others.

I think the respect he gave others, made me respect him. And respect is very important for me. To give and receive. But it did not induce love. And pampering just made me feel nice, but I always knew it was a materialistic nice. And I guess seeing me feel nice, he felt nice. He never did it to make me fall in love with him. I hope.

Since intelligence is a must in people around me, I should have been in love with Dhum, Pinki, Petrovski, Veeru, Jats and looking at intelligence from a different angle, Pilot too.

But I am not. Which effectively negates my dialogue above. I cannot fall in love with anyone just because they are intelligent, or they pamper me, or that they are respectful. I can just be a little pleased with them for it.

I guess love just happens right? Without a reason?




**
So since you are reading this, I shall retract my statement above that I made to you. And rephrase it. A bit. "I don't know how to fall in love with someone. I don't know what can make me fall in love with someone. I don't even think I can define love. But yes, these three things that I listed? They make me think highly of a person. They make me realize that the person cares, for himself (intelligence), me (pampering) and others (respect). Which matters. I guess."

7 comments:

Ashwin said...

I guess there could be different levels of intelligence, different ways of pampering, and..... well, respect is respect!

So, just because someone isn't intelligent, does that imply that he doesn't care about himself?

Just because someone doesn't pamper you, does that mean he doesn't care about you as much?

I loved the post!

Satish Mantha said...

how come my name doesn't get a place in your evaluation? x-(

~The Dream Catcher~ said...

Ashwin- I agree with the first part. Everything written here is relative to my understanding and judgments.

also, yes! If someone does not care enough to enrich their knowledge, be aware about things, be intelligent enough to make logic and rationality work, they do not respect themselves enough.

And Thank you!

Pinki- your name isn't where? I see it right there. And I haven't made any changes or anything also..

Monsoon said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Monsoon said...

Beautifully-written!

If one could just define 'Love', the three things activity would become much simpler, but alas! There's no way to define it. It is such a huge canvas of so much variety of colours, if someone could paint one clear and concrete face out of them, they've got to be one of the luckiest people ever...

It's the eternal mystery - What is love? And why do we love who we love?

sillysneha said...

if you stop putting love on a pedestal.. one day you ll recognize when you re in love... till then i see you running in concentric circles..

ppl forget the four letters are not as complicated as made out to be...

HARDIK said...

sne those 4 letter are complicated....they can make you to fall someone who you never thought about...but yes I agree with your first para it not about trail and error, we need to wait n wait till it strike's...